It’s Killing Me!!

Short and Sweet!!

Lori is busting her hump this week on two major projects. She is swapping out winter clothes and we are in a major push to get all of our junk off the floor. We are having the exterminators to spray the house. I have been struggling this week and I just can’t help her doing what she doing. It hurts my heart to just be here “in case”. She is an amazing woman and there is NO WAY I could have found one this good on my own. I had to be led to her by Divine Intervention. Just one more way God has steered my life long before I hit the rocks and really needed Him.path prepared

God is good and it is hard to see His timing until you turn around and look back. So have faith when God moves and you don’t understand what He is doing. One day you will look back and things will be crystal clear. Practice looking back to see what God has done. When you do this it gives you a confidence in His work. Lori, to me, gives me confidence that He has already prepared a way for me.

Chemo Effects and Brother Gene

Three days from treatment and I’m feeling pretty good. A nice day at home with Lori and the kids. The side effects have not been bad this time. Slight heartburn some fatigue, but I got out moving around and it seemed to get me back on track. Looking forward I can’t wait to see Pete and Letty next week. I missed the annual opening day of dove season again this year. So to all my hunting buddies, I hope you had a good shoot and a safe trip out in the field.

Each time we change my cocktail it’s an adventure waiting to see what kind of side effects and when they will appear. I have to just guess on my first week. My hair will start coming out soon again. I have put in a special order. I want my hair to come in white, slight wave, etc … Anyway,  just as long as it comes back it will be OK.

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In Honor of Paw Paw.

Update on our friend Gene (Paw Paw), he is facing surgery on Monday. He is a strong man (in faith and physically). We are expecting God to step up and work mightily through his doctors. Love you Gene and I can’t wait to see you after the surgery.

Heavenly father, we seek your comfort and wisdom in all the situations we face. We praise your name for guarding Gene and I, especially through our individual battles with this beast called cancer. I thank you for the faith that you have armed Gene and I with. I can’t speak of where Gene’s faith is exactly but I know him well enough to know that God has given him strong faith and is in the process of fine tuning that faith to exactly what Gene needs now. Lord you are so good to us even when we are sinners, unworthy, unfit, but all the while loved by You. I lift up Gene’s family as they love and care for him.  Amen and Amen.

You Are Lucky, Son

Scottish-Lion-Rampant-and-Saltire-Flag“You are lucky, son.” For a brief moment I was speechless. I couldn’t believe the words that had just come out of my Dad’s mouth. We had just been discussing my diagnosis and how it was going to impact my life, along with everyone else (kids, Lori, Dad, Sally, everyone). After what seemed to be an eternity Dad continued, “Most people spend their life talking about their faith, but you are going to get to walk your faith.”

Those words dropped like a bomb. And he was right. It was very shortly after that I began to see God move in mighty ways in my life. From the way Lowe’s helped out beyond disability and returning to work, to my church family rallying around me like I had been the lost son, to the Ironmen stepping up with home projects, to special friends who make it clear by their steadfastness that I am loved and prayed for continuously. I have been overwhelmed by the outpouring of love.

Since then I have been able to walk my faith. I have realized that God is in control of that faith. It is the same faith He gave at salvation. He has just molded it and shaped it into exactly what I need right now. Different circumstances would have required different tweaks to my faith. If I had come from a different background to this exact point, God would have had different tweaks to to make to my faith give me exactly what I need to make it through.

God has given all believers this same malleable faith. It is the “free gift” we are given. It is what allows us to believe in Christ and in turn seals our salvation in Him. But no matter what is going on in our lives, that mustard seed of faith is all we need. God can transform that into a mighty weapon to push Satan’s road blocks out of our path or it may be as simple as faith, if that is all you need. Regardless, God is gracious in the fact that from the time we become believers He has provided us with exactly what we need to cope with what lies in front of us.

Many times we reach a crossroads and are concerned if our prayer life, or if our faith is strong enough. I guess I have said all that to say this. Walk your faith. Understand that you have everything you need right now to handle whatever this world throws your way. God has gifted you with this most powerful gift of faith. If I could have walked my faith prior to being diagnosed with cancer, what could I have accomplished for the kingdom of Christ? So in the end Dad was right, I am very lucky to be able to walk my faith but you are just as lucky. If you can live your life with the realization that God has given you everything you need, you can walk your faith without having a life crisis hanging over your head. Get out and walk your faith and let the everyone see how God has prepared you for what ever the world may throw at you.

God bless!

PS. The rampant lion at the top has become an unofficial symbol for me. It means “deathless courage in battle” when used in association with family crests, etc … I have adopted it to remind me that I have a fight on my hands and with God being in control, all I have to do is be brave, be obedient and never stop fighting.