I’m not trying to turn dark but I am trying to become realistic. Suffering well does not always mean everything is going hunky dory, it means that no matter what is is going on, good or bad, God still shines through the circumstance and others can still see God’s grace and glory reflected in my situation. This was pointed out to me this week by a great doctor whom I feel is turning into a really good friend. He assured me that in bringing out the truth of my situation, for good or bad, it would magnify God’s greatness in the situation. The past couple of weeks it would have been impossible to suffer well without the strength and wisdom provided by the Holy Spirit.
Too often I have noticed that I answer with the simple “fine” or “it’s going good” type answers when people ask how I am doing. This almost negates the fact that without God’s strength this week I don’t know if I could have made it through what I have been going through. Pain that is not well controlled, accompanied by depression because of the pain, run away anxiety about several issues that are pressing on me right now. When you add all that up and you can point to God’s hand moving mightily to help provide for expenses recently, it makes much more of an impact. I praise God for the doctors, nurses, and care givers that have bent over backwards to help me cope with the issues that I have been facing. I praise God for the strength to hold on during time when I am so very anxious about what is going to happen with this fistula and the plastic surgeon I have to meet with on Monday. I pray for courage as I face an upcoming PET scan in a few weeks. I know that the faith God has given me is enough to carry me through all of these. Not just carry me through but to sail through. I still feel as though I have nothing to fear, that the faith God has given me has been formed by fire, molded by trial, to be exactly what I need to face any challenge the enemy lays before me. God has done that for me and will do that for you when your time comes. Walk now as if you have everything you need to face down anything Satan can throw at you. Praise God for news that brings you closer to Christ and praise Him for news that allows you to enjoy His gift of life here for a while longer. You have everything you need, just as I. Like Dad said, I am lucky that I get to walk my faith. Well, you are lucky, too. Start walking your own faith. God has given you all you will need.